Vimala Thomas on understanding issues that Asian Indians face

Chaplaining Bi-Cultural Asian Indians with Sensitivity

According to a 2000 census, there are 1.9 million Asian Indians living in the United States. We are the third largest group (after the Chinese [2.7 million] and the Filipinos [2.4 million]) and one of the largest growing populations [1]. Consequently, it is likely that all chaplains will have opportunities to offer pastoral care to Indians. I offer these reflections to those of you who are non-Indians to consider when you care for compromised individuals who live in an India-based culture while also in the U.S.

In 1993, when I first came from India, I experienced a big cultural shock. Among the many ways that life here is different is the fact that the elderly tend to live alone, even when they have a handicap. This still puzzles me.

Two months ago, I chaplained a 55-year-old female patient. In our pastoral conversation, she mentioned that her mother-in-law has dementia and lives alone. Her husband calls his mother every evening to ensure that things are going well. Over the phone, gives his mother step-by-step instructions for preparing dinner: go to the refrigerator, remove dinner, microwave it, and eat it. My patient also mentioned that she visits her mother-in-law often to help her. Their home is only 15 minutes away! This was strange to me because, in Indian culture, elders are never left alone. The son would either live in his mother’s house or move her in with him.

A few weeks ago, I provided pastoral care to an 84-year-old female patient who went blind seven years ago from glaucoma. Her children live elsewhere. I was shocked to hear that she lives alone. I could not imagine how she could learn life all over again—at her age—with this handicap.

At times I feel sorry for these elderly folk. However, they do not seem to feel sorry for themselves. I asked the 84-year-old blind woman, “How do you manage to live by yourself?” I was surprised to hear the answer. “I have no problem; I have been living in this house for 40 years. I know where things are.” I said, “I would not be able to do that.” She replied, “Well, when there is a need, you will learn.” This was a good learning experience for me.

In my chaplaincy work and in my life in the U.S., I also come across many young, single men and women who live alone. This is also very foreign to me because, in Indian culture, few live alone. Young people usually live with their parents until they are married–and few remain unmarried. Often, a married couple continues to live at home until the next son gets married.

Here are a few additional reflections:

(1)	Indian patients usually have strong support systems from family and friends.
(2)	If their families are not in this country, they feel lost and isolated and then, they need additional support.
(3)	Many Indians are simultaneously rooted in Indian culture and their host country. They may be struggling to adjust to the U.S. (This may include having difficulty getting used to hospital food!)
(4)	Many Indians speak English well; this does not mean that they have lived here long or that they understand English like a native speaker.
(5)	New immigrants may not have adequate medical insurance and may have significant financial worries.

[1] Satya R. Pattnayak. “Challenges for Asian Indian Americans in the 21st Century” (www.nriol.com)

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