Chaplain Mike Hansen on fragility and resiliency

The Mind and the Body

When you read the title of this essay and believe that I am, as a chaplain, going to write about how connected the mind and body are for healing the whole person, you would be half right. Indeed there is a strong connection between the two. However, I want to explore the connection in a different, not often thought of way.

I know those who read these words have spent many hours – countless hours – being present for the grieving families left behind by loved ones who have died. Maybe it was a single trauma that ended a life all too soon, or an aortic aneurysm with the same result. Maybe the deceased was finally at rest after a long struggle with a debilitating disease that robbed him or her of life’s vitality and ultimately the will to go on.

With the above scenarios there was a process, whether sudden or drawn out, that had a beginning and an end. Something in the body triggered it to eventually shut down completely.

I can also say that you who read these words have answered the door to your office or arrived on a unit to see the person who may have had the very same process found above standing on his or her own two feet with a grateful smile thanking anyone and everyone for the care that was shown. You are elated and surprised all at once. When you finally have a moment to yourself, you just shake your head in wonder at the resiliency of the human body to escape death like that.

Fragility and resiliency – two clearly dissimilar words that adequately describe the human body. Ten seconds without oxygen to the brain and a person can end up as a vegetable for the rest of his or her life. And yet another person with same anoxic event can not only be extubated in two days but within a week be sleeping in his or her own bed safe at home.

I don’t want take the space to explore the difference between the two people illustrated above (asking how and why either one ends as they do), but draw a parallel.

It is probably reasonable to assume that at least a portion of those reading this have experienced a form of psychological trauma, whether recent or early in life.

What I propose is the parallel between the human body and the human mind. Recent research [1] has indicated that it is easier to remember bad things than good things, especially if there are strong emotions attached. Research studies revealed that “the painful or unhappy memories people would most like to leave behind may be the ones that are most difficult to dislodge.”[2]

What does this tell me, and what good does it do me as a chaplain? Or, more importantly, as a parent? Words, events and images leave marks. Deep marks, whether good or bad. The research indicates that bad words, events and images stay longer and stronger in the mind than good or mundane words, events and images, especially when emotions are involved.

What I say and do matters. If I spend my time berating people and saying only bad things or treat people badly, marks are left. How many of us have been on the receiving end of harsh criticism or words spoken in a mean spirit and – even many years later – remember them as if they were spoken yesterday?

On the other hand, how many of us remember kind or encouraging words that have lifted us up and helped us learn, grow and mature? These words, whether connected to an event or particular circumstances, bring a smile to our faces.

The mind is, like the body, both fragile and resilient. One trauma can leave deep scars for a lifetime. Many and repeated traumas can lead to mental illness. But one encouraging word or repeated praise can have the opposite affect leading a person to become a healthy and thriving human being, whole.

Footnotes:

[1] Payne, B. Keith and Corrigan, Elizabeth, “Emotional Constraints on Intentional Forgetting.” Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, vol. 43, 780-786.

[2] Ibid., 784.

Do you have thoughts about education & research you’d like to share with your colleagues? Send an e-mail to info@PlainViews.org.