Kenneth I. Pargament, Ph.D., on spiritual twists and turns

Spiritual Struggles as a Fork in the Road to Growth or Decline

“I am told that God lives in me – and yet the reality of darkness and coldness and emptiness is so great that nothing touches my soul. . . I want God with all the power of my soul – and yet between us there is terrible separation. . . Heaven from every side is closed” (The Toledo Blade, 2003, p. 6A). These are the words of Mother Teresa who experienced profound feelings of divine abandonment as she worked with homeless children and dying people in the slums of Calcutta. Mother Teresa’s example is not new or unique. The heroic figures of the world’s great religious traditions – from Moses and Jesus to Buddha and Muhammed – also faced moments of spiritual turmoil in their lives. Clearly, spiritual struggles are not a sign of a lack of religious commitment or weak faith. Neither are they unusual. Surveys indicate that approximately 10 to 65% of adults in the United States experience interpersonal religious conflicts, occasional religious doubts, and feelings of abandonment, anger, and anxiety in relation to the divine (see Exline & Rose, 2005; Pargament, Murray-Swank, Magyar, & Ano, 2005). If spiritual struggles are not a sign of weak faith and not unusual, what are they?

Spiritual Struggles as a Natural Part of Spiritual Life

Spirituality can be likened to a journey, a lifelong venture to discover, hold on to, and at times, transform a relationship with the sacred (see Pargament, 2007 for a review). No one’s spiritual journey is exactly the same as another’s. Many people experience their spiritual quest as relatively smooth and steady, but most people encounter some surprising twists and turns in this process. Internal transitions or external crises have a way of shaking people not only psychologically, socially, and physically, but spiritually as well. The result is spiritual struggles. Spiritual struggles are expressions of conflict, question, and doubt regarding matters of faith, God, and religious relationships.

As painful as they may be, spiritual struggles are a natural and normal part of spiritual development. They are signs of a spiritual worldview in transition and they can be launching pads for change and transformation. Without spiritual struggles, people would remain frozen in childhood religions that are often ill-equipped to deal with the challenges brought on by changes in the self and the complex fast-paced external world.

Spiritual Struggles as a Fork in the Road

Struggles are a fork in the road. One branch leads to significant problems. Research studies have consistently linked spiritual struggles to a variety of negative outcomes, ranging from depression and anxiety to poorer recovery following a medical illness, PTSD, and suicidality (see Pargament et al., 2005 for review). Spiritual struggles have even been predictive of a greater risk of mortality. In a longitudinal study of over 500 medically ill elderly hospitalized patients, struggles with the divine were associated with a 22% to 33% greater risk of dying over a two-year period.

Although spiritual struggles are not without risk, they can also propel people in the direction of growth. In this vein, Saint John of the Cross (1584/1990) described spiritual struggles as a “dark night of the soul” brought forth by God as a natural part of spiritual development. He said: “the Divine assails the soul in order to renew it and thus to make it Divine” (p. 104). Several researchers have found that spiritual struggles are, in fact, associated with personal growth and positive spiritual transformation (see Pargament et al., 2005 for a review). Taken as a whole, empirical studies suggest that spiritual struggles are a fork in the road that can lead to distress, pain, and decline or to growth and positive spiritual transformation. A key question follows.

What Determines whether Spiritual Struggles Lead to Growth or Decline?

Four questions are important to consider. First, is the individual’s spirituality broad and deep or thin and narrow? In the context of American individualism, many people today prefer a “go-it-alone” or “cafeteria style” approach in which they choose from a smorgasbord of options within a religious tradition or between religious traditions. While this cafeteria style approach may satisfy the appetites of some people, it may leave others spiritually malnourished. As a result, we find people who lack spiritual depth and breadth. These people focus on their own personal fulfillment without considering the spiritual well-being of others, engage in hollow rituals disconnected from feelings of spiritual uplift and awe, and create their own theologies that are disconnected from the wisdom of great spiritual teachers, past and present.

Second, does the individual worship large or small gods? Perhaps because many adults today have received little in the way of religious education, they are left with child-like conceptions of divinity, “small gods” that cannot shed light on the profound problems of life.
Pastor J. B. Phillips (1997) describes many of these “small gods,” such as the god of Absolute Perfection who insists on complete and total loyalty and flawless performance, and the Heavenly Bosom who provides limitless solace and comfort without ever asking for anything in return. These limited representations of the sacred cannot deal with the full spectrum of human potential and the complete range of life challenges.

Third, is the individual spiritually flexible or inflexible? Multiple studies have shown that people who are both highly religiously committed and spiritually flexible show fewer physical symptoms, greater well-being, and better life adjustment (e.g., McIntosh & Spilka, 1990). Conversely, spiritual inflexibility bodes less well, particularly for people in the midst of struggles when their inflexibility may result in “getting spiritually stuck.”

Finally, does the struggling individual experience support or stigma? The experience of spiritual struggles is often accompanied by feelings of guilt and shame. Religious groups can exacerbate these feelings by condemning individuals who voice spiritual questions and doubts. For example, one woman responded to the introduction of evolution into a university’s curriculum with a letter in which she wrote: “If her [daughter’s] faith is shattered or shaken, I’d rather see her dead” (Nesson, 2001). However, spiritual struggles may have a more positive outcome if they are met with empathy, support, and guidance rather than stigma.

Four Recommendations for Working with Spiritual Strugglers

First, identify people who are struggling spiritually. Because people who are unable to resolve their spiritual struggles are at greatest risk for declines in health and well-being, it is important to identify people who are struggling before these struggles become chronic. Hospital chaplain and researcher, George Fitchett (1999), advocates actively screening people in healthcare settings to identify those at “spiritual risk.” He recommends brief questions about anger at God, fear of punishment by God, disappointments in faith or religious institutions, and lifetime changes in the importance of spiritual or religious faith to determine whether an in-depth spiritual assessment and spiritually-oriented counseling may be warranted.

Second, normalize spiritual struggles and create opportunities to discuss them.

People often respond with relief and gratitude when their struggles are met with understanding and acceptance rather than threat and rebuke. One spiritual intervention called “Crying Out to God” provides participants with the opportunity to talk openly about spiritual struggles (Zornow, 2001). Led by a pastor, the program helps people address their feelings of abandonment, anger, and isolation in their relationships with God. Based on the psalms of lament, “Crying Out to God” encourages people to restore their connection with God by voicing all of their emotions to the divine. Participants are taught that God is big enough to listen to negative as well as positive feelings.

Third, draw on spiritual resources to address spiritual struggles. Struggles can be resolved more effectively within the context of a broader and deeper spirituality. For example, Nicole Murray-Swank (2003) developed an eight-session spiritually-integrated program, “Solace for the Soul,” to address the spiritual struggles of women who had been sexually abused as children. Many of these women suffer from harsh, controlling images of God. “Solace for the Soul” has helped women to see God in a more loving light. In one exercise, participants are asked to imagine God’s love as a waterfall within themselves: “Picture God as a waterfall within you. . . pouring down cool, refreshing water. . . the waters of love, healing, restoration throughout your body. . . a cool, refreshing waterfall washing down over your head, your face, your shoulders, your neck, out through your arms, down your legs, out through your toes, refreshing, bringing life, quenching thirst. . . renewing, refreshing, restoring” (p. 232).

Finally, help people anticipate spiritual struggles before they occur. Through religious education, children and adolescents could be taught to foresee, understand, and cope with the spiritual struggles they are likely to face in their lives. Adults could also gain from programs that help them anticipate the nature of spiritual doubt, conflicts with the church, and struggles with the divine. By strengthening spiritual resources, recognizing the reality of spiritual struggles, and assisting people in the process of resolving these struggles, religious communities may be able to help people grow rather than decline through their own dark nights of the soul.

References

Exline, J. J., and Rose, E. (2005). Religious and spiritual struggles. In R. F. Paloutzian & C. L. Park (Eds.) Handbook of the psychology of religion and spirituality (pp. 315-330). New York: Guilford Press.

Fitchett, G. (1999). Screening for spiritual risk. Chaplaincy Today, 15, 2-12.

McIntosh, D., & Spilka, B. (1990). Religion and mental health: The role of personal faith and control. In M. Lynn & D. Moberg (Eds.), Research in the social scientific study of religion (Vol. 2, pp. 167-194). Greenwich, CT: JAI Press.

Murray-Swank, N. A. (2003). Solace for the soul: An evaluation of a psychospiritual intervention for female survivors of sexual abuse. Doctoral dissertation, Bowling Green State University, Bowling Green, Ohio.

Nesson, L. [Narrator], (2001). What about God? [Television Series]. WGBH Video.

Pargament, K. I. (2007). Spiritually-integrated psychotherapy: Understanding and addressing the sacred. New York: Guilford Press.

Pargament, K. I., Murray-Swank, N. A., Magyar, G. M., & Ano, G. G. (2005). Spiritual struggle: A phenomenon of interest to psychology and religion. In W. R. Miller and H. D. Delaney (Eds.), Judeo-Christian perspectives on psychology: Human nature, motivation, and change (pp. 245-268). Washington DC: APA Press.

Phillips, J. B. (1997). Your God is too small. New York: Touchstone Book.

Saint John of the Cross. (1990). The dark night of the soul: A masterpiece in the literature of mysticism by St. John of the Cross (E. A. Peers, Trans.). New York: Image Books, Doubleday. (Original work published 1584).

Toledo Blade (2003, September). God’s silence plagued soul of Mother Teresa. Section A, p. 6.

Zornow, G. B. (2001). Crying out to God: Uncovering prayer in the midst of suffering. Unpublished manuscript.

Do you have thoughts about long view you’d like to share with your colleagues? Send an e-mail of any length to info@PlainViews.org.